Reflections of a Man's Heart

Just 14 days are left until January 30, when Rye Mi is supposed to arrive here.

 

. . .

 

Still some paperwork left on the spanish side of the equation, but after I talk with the guy in charge of visas in the spanish embassy in Seoul, I feel reasonably confident... 

 

Of course, he couldn't give a definite 'yes'. But even if she had to come one or two weeks later, nothing really bad would happen.

 

. . .

 

This time has been really tough for us, but finally she finished everything there, including her thesis (which is now in print), and now she is enjoying some quiet time with her family.

 

They accept the situation, so everything will be ok in the korean side.

 

In fact, giving her time to communicate and share with her family before she came was the most important reason why we have endured such a long separation, besides she finishing her thesis.

 

Really, really tough separation.

 

God. Sooo tough.

 

. . .

 

It all looks unreal, now that it is about to happen.

 

Wow.

 

Thanks God!

 

. . .

 

Now the "normal" work of a live-together relationship will begin.

 

Ha ha. "Normal live-together relationship"? Is there such thing?

 

When raising a family, having to share the shower, sex, money and friendship mix, all sorts of strange things happen...

 

Yet, "the living cannot help but love the world"

 

^^

 

And, while I'm not afraid of what might come, I look at what's coming with a lot of respect...

 

Especially, I'm worried about the side effects of economic and communicational dependence on her, so we will work very hard at her becoming as autonomous as possible.

 

Think everything will be all right on the "people around her" side. There will be a lot of english speaking people around her, and I think I must have have found all korean things in Bcn, so she can met them too.

 

I really researched like crazy for all korean things around, from food stores (2) to restaurants (4, each one with a different specialty) to korean schools (really, there is one where the children of mixed couples learn korean on saturdays!), churches (yes, we have!), or korean-whatevers.

 

I even found a spanish guy who is married to a korean woman almost the same age as Rye Mi.

 

Being the extroverted side of the family, I'm sure she will make friends outside of my own circle fast. Think that is really important for her -as well as a healthy relation.

 

And, on the economic side, it was not a problem at all in my prior relation, when Vale was completely dependent on me for the first four years.

 

At least, she always told me everything was ok, and felt very grateful we always handled that without a single problem. Since she said after we finished our relations, and while discussing what support Rye Mi would need, it must be true.

 

. . .

 

So curious re-reading this and seeing the INTJ guy in me always planning . . .

 

All those words to say that I hope she finds her own place, that she becomes the best she can be, that she be herself... and that all that can happen while she is by my side.

 

But, I don't want the later if she can't have all other things... After all, we are supposed to be friends who sincerely care about each other's growth, isn't it? And friends we are!

 

. . .

 

And, in the end, despite all planning, what she will really need more is love and unconditional support.

 

That is the difficult part no planning or money can provide. How often we get lost and choose power, money, social relevance... How often we refuse to carry the prize.

 

. . .

 

Feel sure about my choice, even knowing it will not be easy. Especially after knowing all difficulties.

 

No need to pretend not to see what is there for love to bloom ^^

 

. . .

 

Time to remember a nice poem, before this gets too dense...

 

 

Come quickly -as soon as
these blossoms open,
they fall.
This world exists
as a sheen of dew on flowers.